12 July 2009

Not so cunning marketing strategy volume 3

A while ago a man came to my front door selling laminated flyers for people to put in their windows asking people not to try and sell them things on their doorstep.

Not quite sure he got the irony...

Overheard gem

Whilst walking home from work last week I heard the following whilst walking past two girls stood outside a Burger King...

"Do they sell burgers?"

10 May 2009

Not so cunning marketing strategy volume 2

I went to the cinema last Wednesday. As I was going up the escalators from the car park I noticed two posters. One was a charity appeal asking for money to help children with cleft palates. There were several photos of children affected.

The poster next to it was for a well know brand of toothpaste with the tag line - 'Get the Smile'. Smiling down was a handsome man with a perfect smile.

Just struck me as a rather discordant piece of poster placement.

16 April 2009

Insert humorous blog title here...

This one come from my friend Kim...

Whilst walking through the town centre one Sunday morning, she passed a row of cash points. At one of these a man in a balaclava was stood with a screwdriver fiddling with one of the machines. What was strange about this situation was that everyone (my friend included) just walked passed without challenging the guy...

Life is weird sometimes.

26 March 2009

Not so cunning marketing strategy

Recently I walked past on of those advertising boards that has rolling posters in. This one had three posters on it. Two were healthy living posters, the other was a advert for fried chicken. Not entirely sure who decided that those posters should go together but they obviously weren't thinking too much that day.

8 March 2009

Curious Queue Encounter

I was stood in a queue recently waiting to get my lunch. As is quite common in shops, the queue passed next to a stand with various packets of crisps and sweets on.

As I stood in the queue, a lady came up behind me and politely asked if she could just reach past me to some crisps which were at about knee level.
"Sure", I said, stepping to one side. "Thanks" she replied and then added "I didn't want you to think I was weird and just sticking my head up your bum".

Now don't get me wrong, I appreciate politeness. However the little add on just made me smile and in a way was weirder than if she had just pushed past me.

Surreal Shopping Trip

A few years ago I was walking through the town centre of my home town - so far so normal. That is until you add in:

1) A knight in full armour on horse back walking up the main street.

2) 3 men dressed as Elvis on stilts with mini guitars walking through town singing. Was getting quite freaked out by this as they seemed to be following me everywhere.

Never did find out what the event was... Mind you considering my home town, there wasn't necessarily going to be a reason!

18 February 2009

Puerile but funny...

My thanks to Karl for this one...

There is a drain cover round the corner from us which simply states 'Cock 3 in'.

Made me smile.

16 February 2009

Proof That Romance Still Lives

Saturday just gone was Valentine's Day. Depending on your view point this is either a day to treat the special person in your life or a day to ignore at all costs.

Regardless of your view point I think you have to appreciate the effort that went into this. On the approach to my office, just outside the Co-op and opposite the train station there is an area of paving. At the tail end of last week I noticed that the people who regularly jet wash the paving slabs had washed a heart shape out on the stones. They did this last year as well. I haven't seen them do it so I'm not sure if they use a stencil but it is a perfect heart shape with no wobbles.

The big softies.

11 February 2009

Polish Doorstep Challenge

One Saturday morning a while back, there was a knock on my door.; Slightly irritated I got up from watching 'Football Focus' and went to answer the door. I opened it to find myself looking at two young blonde women. They smiled at me, I smiled back and in quite accented English, they said "Hello, We are looking for Polish speakers."

I shook my head and politely informed them that no one who lived here spoke Polish. We all smiled again and they went away. I'm pretty sure they went to every house in the street.

Proof that you don't have to leave your house to see randomness.

4 February 2009

Cunning Marketing Strategy

This was the exit sign at Chester Zoo. Talk about a captive audience. You can never leave!

Your guess is as good as mine...

We came across this van in Portugal. Not entirely sure what it meant... perhaps the van was powered by a new eco fuel made from hoodies...

2 February 2009

Snow Story 2

Did I mention it snowed today? This one comes from my friend and first blog groupie Colleen.

Outside of a newsagent she saw two young girls with a snowball about the size of a basketball. There was a big argument between them about who was going to go into the shop and who was going to stay outside with the snowball.

In the end they both went into the shop. Fair play to Colleen for not nicking the snowball!

Snow Graffiti

It snowed today. During a particularly slippery walk to work, I came across this little gem which brightened my day.

My route to work takes me through a supermarket car park. Someone clearly had too much time on their hands. On one of the car park walls someone had made an outline of a man with his hands up in snow. In big capital letters next to it they had also written on the wall in snow 'Don't Shoot'. Made me smile.

30 January 2009

An honourable mention...

As the title suggests this one had the potential to be amazing but unfortunately turned into a case of close but no cigar. I mention it merely because what it nearly was is brilliant.

One day a few years ago I was having lunch with my family in a country pub. Was quite a nice day and the pub was on a canal so it was quite busy. Into the pub came a troop of Morris Men kitted out in the full gear. Luckily it seemed they were more interested in a pint of beer rather than demonstrating their dancing prowess. A little while after a coach pulled up in the car park and out stepped a rival gang of Morris dancers.

The first group went out to the car park and for one fleeting glorious moment it looked like there was going to be a Morris Man dance off. Alas it wasn't to be and the afternoon finished with them all sitting around enjoying a pint but the thought of what could of been is worth a smile in itself.

In need of a new crystal ball

My route to and from work takes me through the city's main shopping centre. One of the larger shops is the a branch of a well known bookshop chain. Besides selling the usual books, stationary and coffee, they do on occasion host various events.

Walking past one morning I noticed a poster up in the door advertising a psychic evening. Across this another sign had been placed which simply said 'cancelled'.

'Ha,' I sniggered to myself as I walked on. 'Didn't see that one coming did you?'

The one that started it all...

The following actually happened and is the story that inspired this blog. It happened a couple of years ago now but the story is still worth telling...

One night whilst walking home from a friend's house, my route home took me down a quiet side road behind a parade of shops. To one side of the road is a walled car park for a funeral directors. On the wall next to gate is a sign with the name of the business. As I turned into the road, a small car pulled up in the layby in front of the gate and two lads and two girls got out. So far so normal.

However as I walked closer I noticed that they were taking out from the boot of the car an ironing board, some clothes and an iron. One of the lads then climbed up on top of wall and was passed up the ironing board and iron. This was then set up above the sign. The other lad then climbed up with him and the two of them pretended to iron whilst the two girls took photos. Mission accomplished the two guys climbed down, the car was repacked and the four of them drove off. Now I've heard of extreme ironing but still...

If by any chance one of those four people happen to read this I'd love to see the photos!

29 January 2009


Welcome one and all to A Cornucopia of Compendious Curiosities. Over the next few weeks (but probably more likely months), I will endeavour to record some of the many weird and wonderful things that go on in the world around us.

Anything can be submitted for inclusion in the Cornucopia of Compendious Curiosities. The only provisos are that they have to be things that you have seen yourself (not read about or watched on youtube). They also have to be inoffensive and not take advantage of anyone. This is about celebrating the random fun to had in life not taking the mick out of anyone.

If reading some of the entries manage to brighten up your day than this little blog will have fulfilled its purpose. So if you've got a few minutes to spare, read, enjoy and feel free to share the random little things that brighten up your day.